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My mantra is that "the boat can take more than the crew can" - i.e. generally speaking the crew will chicken out and refuse to launch rather than risk a launch in conditions that are too scary for them or they will turn back LOOOONG before getting to the point at which they find the boat is starting to break up under them. If you are offshore and out of reach of safe harbour and/or rescue you can and should plan to ride out extreme conditions because there is no other option available to you but you are not likely to find yourselves in this situation on a kayak - this is more an issue for offshore mariners. On a kayak you should always use discretion and have one eye on the weather and another on your route and your ability to GTFO if you need to.
I have been caught out by the weather, equipment breakage & an unexpected capsize (NB don't read too much into the capsize bit: I have only ever capsized when sailing or attempting to beach through surf which has built up while I have been out and then only early in my Hobieing days - these days I have learnt techniques/built up experience to avoid both forms of capsize).
I have never been out in conditions or situations when I have really felt my life to be in danger but I am always mindful that situations can change in seconds. On the few occasions when I have been caught out by weather I have always been impressed by my boat: no matter how wild the wind & waves, while I may have been concerned about the sea state and/or my abilities, my boat has always carried me through. If I am caught out by breakage I IMMEDIATELY turn for home - no questions: there are only so many backups available to you in terms of propulsion (pedal, paddle and possibly sail) and one-less than all of them is one too few for me. Ditto capsize, though it is years since my last one. I have been overtaken by darkness too - this can be quite scary though the threat where I kayak is more about being run down by a stink boat than being swallowed up by a sea monster, dashed onto the rocks, dying from exposure or paddling off over the horizon.
On a kayak you should plan your expeditions consistent with your skills, experience, fitness and risk profile (remembering that you are likely to suck others, not just yourself, into sharing your risky situations if you push it too hard). And you should always be ready to self-rescue and more importantly to call an expedition off early and head for the nearest coffee shop/safe harbour if conditions are or become too hairy - you are VERY much at the mercy of your environment and a VERY small target in a VERY big environment for any rescue effort - better to play it safe than be sorry.
So to get back to your question: how much can you and your crew take and how much do you and your crew want to take? It is likely that you will want less than your Oasis can theoretically handle... just play it safe, kayak within your limits, don't be afraid to call it off before you leave shore/early in the face of bad weather, be self-reliant and responsible and keep plenty in the tank until you become more familiar with each environment you kayak in, your abilities and those of your boat and crew.
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