Most people ( women) I talk to, want to go out in a kayak just so they can 'pet' them. "they're so cute!!"...No, No they're not, they're ugly, and so is their momma. Their breath stinks, and they'll blow snot on you. These people have no freaking idea...
Actually, I've never smelled their breath. One of my co-workers was telling me about the day he was working on his dock in a canal, and one of them came up from behind him. For some reason it started sucking on his swim trunks... He also got the snot treatment as he pushed it away.
I do feel somewhat sorry for them. During my second encounter of the day, I was looking down and I saw these white stripes under me and was wondering "what in the hell is that??". That's when everything exploded, and as I was hanging on for dear life, I realized they were prop scars on the back of the manatee. My experience kind of exposes a myth put out by the Save the Manatee Club. I mean
one of the reasons for all of the go slow zones, is so the manatee will hear the boat coming and move out of the way. Well, I'm going slow as hell and they ain't movin' out of my way! I know the Hobie is quiet, but it's not that quiet. I'm about to install curb feelers on the bow of the yak... First choice would be a harpoon gun, but it weighs too much.
Honestly, I wish I was as lucky playing the lottery as I am running over manatees
